When Miracles Happen

Have you ever hoped for a miracle?  I always thought about all those miracles performed in the Bible and thought, "Wouldn't it be cool if I saw something like that?"  I'm here to tell you today that God is working a miracle in me.

A short month ago I told you how my new treatment was working so well.  Last week Thursday I got a call from my oncologist.  Now understand, she rarely calls me and it's usually due to something we have to change in our treatment.  That wasn't the case this time.  She just had to call because she was so excited.  If you remember, last time my Ca-125 dropped from 1300+ to 500.  Well, it dropped again, this time to 192.  It hasn't been that low since April of 2011.  She just can't believe the results we are getting from this drug. Neither can her team because they had to call me early Friday morning because they were also very excited.

From a human standpoint, it's easy to see why this looks so unbelievable.  We got this drug faster than anyone is normally supposed to get it.  It's working better than anyone expected.  I have energy and stamina like I haven't had in years.  How can this be explained?

But I know.  It's God and all God.  The God who is all-powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere is the one who had this plan worked out for me before the world was created.  He knew I was going to need more strength to help my son with his broken ankle.  He knew that it was time for me to be more involved with my family.  He knew it was time for me to see His awesome power. 

Join me today in praising our God and Savior for the physical miracle he is working in me.  But also join me in praising God for the miracle He has worked in you -- that is the miracle of your faith.  We know that He worked that miracle in you because of of this verse in Ephesians:

 

We are all miracles because of God's grace working faith in our hearts.  We can thank God for miracles every day.  To God be the Glory!

Running the Race

Our family has really been enjoying the Olympics this year.  It's amazing to see how dedicated these people are to their training and to their sport.  Win or loose, their dedication is inspiring.


It got me thinking about my journey with cancer.  It really is like a race, and even more like a marathon.  It's not something you can sprint through.  You put one foot in front of the other and keep going.  Some parts of the race are easier while others are much harder.  But to get to the finish line you just keep going.  Win or loose, you just need to get there.


With cancer there are many ways of looking at if you are winning or loosing.  It all depends on where you are in your treatment and what you are hoping for.  For most winning will mean being in remission.  For others like myself, winning means having a good quality of life.  That's what I've been praying for and that is what God has granted me this last month with more energy.  


One month ago I started a clinical trial with the drug veliparib, a parp inhibitor.  Our goal with this was truly to have a better quality of life.  Anything else we always felt would be an extra blessing from God.  Well, He in His infinite wisdom and mercy decided to give us an extra blessing. 
After one month I got my first cancer number back today. It is 500!!!! It had been somewhere between 1300 and 1400 just one short month ago. All I can do is give God the glory!!

When I think back to May when my oncologist suggested this, and then how quickly it came about that I was able to be put on a drug trial, I can only say that this was all in God's control. He had this worked out years ago when we started this journey. He knew I was going to need to be more active so I could help my son with his broken ankle. He knew that through this I could share His awesome power. He knew that this was a time where we needed to see something more tangible in how He is taking care of us. What more can I say but THANK YOU GOD!!

But back to the race.  Yes, my life with cancer is a race with ups and downs.  I just keep pressing forward to the goal of remission.  But really our entire life is a race.  Here's what the Apostle Paul says in 1 Corinthians:

While I would love the prize of remission, there is a bigger prize that I want even more.  I want the prize of Heaven.  Praise be to God that He has given us this prize not by anything that we have done or might be able to do.  We would never measure up by doing it ourselves.  We have only received this prize through the life, death and resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ.  I am going to run the race God has given me always pressing toward the goal of Heaven.  I can do this by surrounding myself daily with His Word and His promises.  I can be strengthened by receiving His body and blood in communion.  Because of His grace and mercy I will be in Heaven some day.  Even if I never reach the goal of remission, I am still a winner because I am a winner in Christ.

What happens after this is all in God's control. If this is where my number stays that's His plan. If it continues to drop, it's His plan. If it goes up, it's His plan.  We continue to know like it say in Proverbs, 

We will continue to bask in this wonderful news. We will continue to pray boldly to ask for healing.  But no matter what happens, I am a winner in Christ Jesus.

Dealing with Change

When you are dealing with chronic cancer, change is an inevitable part of life with cancer.  Sometimes it is expected, like at the beginning when you have no evidence of disease for the first time.  Other times it is unexpected when the cancer comes back, the treatment doesn't work, or your body just can't handle the drugs that it is being given.

Over the past three years we've dealt with plenty of change in our lives from the initial cancer diagnosis, to a short time in remission to the constant changing of different chemo regiments.  Each change brings its challenges and its blessings.  This time with change I feel like there is more riding on it than ever before.

I met with my gynecological oncologist yesterday.  She gave me a big hug right from the start.  (Yes, I am fortunate to have a relationship with her.) I got the ins and outs of this new trial drug, or parp-inhibitor, (Veliparib or ABT-888) that I will be on. 

So here's what the parp inhibitor does and why it could be effective for me.  All our cells have DNA that need to be repaired.  Cancer cells are no different. Because I have a BRCA mutant gene, that avenue of repair is gone for the cancer cells.  So they use a back door, so to speak, of the protein parp.  The parp inhibitor stops that back door from working and can, in effect, kill the cancer.  That's also why this type of treatment only works for people who have a BRCA mutation.

I start this on Friday.  I will be taking 300mg of this twice a day.  For me that means 6 pills in the morning and 6 pills at night every day for as long as I can handle it.  If I have problems, we can lower the dose and then go back up when I get better.  The best chance I have of this succeeding is with the 300mg dose.  I will also be taking anti-nausea pills before the inhibitor because that is the most common side effect.

Exciting possibilities are definitely here for me, but this science is not perfected.  It works for about 40 percent of people.  Nausea is the most common side effect.  That is a big deal for me since that's what I've been struggling with as of late and what put me in the hospital so many times the beginning of this year.  We already have some hydration scheduled just in case I need it.  Prayerfully I will follow the normal pattern and the nausea will only be around the time I take the inhibitor and after two weeks it will be much better, possibly even gone.  We will also have to watch my blood counts.  The possibility is there that after 6 months my blood counts will just be too low and I will have to stop. 

So we head into this change.  Am I excited?  Yes.  Am I scared?  Absolutely.  In some ways this seems like my last chance since this is what my doctor has been hoping to get me on since I had my recurrence two years ago. 

But as always, God gives us things to remember to trust in Him.  I read some stories today about women who have been on continual treatment for 11-15 years.  It hasn't been easy, but they are still here.  I have also heard from women who have been on this inhibitor that they have gotten their energy back and their cancer has decreased. 

But the best thing God gave me today was a devotion based on Psalm 46.  Here is an excerpt:

"Yes, God is bigger and stronger than all our experiences. He can handle all our difficulties. God has already canceled the sting of our greatest enemy—death. He did it by offering up his one and only Son so that we might live with him forever in his kingdom.

Sometimes it is good that our lives come to a screeching halt. It reminds us that the LORD almighty is our God. And it shows us that he is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble."

So our family will once again learn to deal with change.  But with that change comes the promise that God is with us at all times.  He has taken care of our biggest problem of sin.  He can easily take care of everything else, in His way, and in His time.

(If you ever have any questions, or anything you would like me to blog about, you can either leave me a comment here or email me at lisarittierodt@gmail.com)