I Was Looking for Comfort but Instead I Found Hope

We all long for comfort in some way or another.  We try to find that elusive mattress that we know will give us ultimate comfort and the the perfect sleep.  For others it might be that pair of comfortable shoes that will let you be on your feet all day long.  But my guess is most of us look for comfort from others -- a hug, a cry, a laugh that lets you know that someone is there for you.

Many of you know that I have been searching for comfort and peace the past week.  As the holidays grow closer, the reality that this might be my last Christmas here on earth makes my spirit sink. I long to be with my children every night, but they need to keep on living their normal lives which includes sports, jobs and friends.  But what hurts the most is knowing that I will be leaving them behind without a mother and my husband without a partner.  There is nothing I can do about that.  When God calls me home, I will be going home.  But knowing that doesn't give me comfort when I know the pain that will be left behind when I go home to Heaven.

This part of Psalm 31 really shows how I felt:

 "Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow week with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief.

 My life is consumed by anguish and my years by groaning; my strength fails because of my affliction, and my bones grow weak."

I've cried out to God.  I've screamed at Him.  I've questioned His purpose.  I've told Him how mad I am that I couldn't be one of the survivors and I couldn't be one of His miracles.  I've wondered what in the world He was doing with me and what He is going to do with my family.  I've been mad with God.  I'm not proud of that, but it's the truth. 

And you know what happened?  He met me at that place.  He reminded me that He knows what He is doing, and even if He chooses not to do what I want, He still has something better for me, and that is hope.

This small part of the journey started when I read this WELS Daily Devotion.  It starts with this passage:

 
I started reading this looking for comfort, but when I got to this part of the devotion, I found so much more.

What does God's word say?  "Your sin has been paid for,"  That's why God the Son came into this world.  He became flesh and blood to pay the price that we cannot pay.  His blood is holy, for Jesus never sinned.  His blood is precious, for it is the blood of God.  And that's the price he paid for you:  His holy, precious blood.

 What comfort!  No matter what you face in this life, cling to the word of your God, cling to his tender words of comfort.  He has paid the ultimate price for you and me.  The glory our God has prepared for us far outweighs our present suffering.  He is ht Shepherd who carries us in his arms to take us home.  What comfort!

Talk about a reality check.  God has taken care of my worst problem, my sin.  So now no matter what I face, what I struggle with, what sins I commit, I am still looked at as a sinless child of God by looking through the blood of the Lamb.

And then the hope came.  This isn't the hope of something we wish will happen or we wish we will get.  Oh no, this hope is something that comes with a 100% guarantee of happening.  It says so here:

  Yes, I have been suffering a long time.  And when I look back at all those years, I can see how God worked some of those characteristics in me.  They are not perfect, BUT HOPE IS!!  We will never be put to shame by anyone who doesn't believe what we do.  Why?  Because the Holy Spirit is reminding us every day that if God is for us, who or what can be against us, that our lives are important to him, and that our salvation is one.  That's the hope we have.  That's the hope the has the 100% guarantee.

So I looked for comfort and I got hope.  But then again, I think I got comfort as well. 

Why I Don't Give Up

"That's it!  I give up!"  That's a statement that I've heard my children say from time to time.  When they were younger it might have been about a game they just couldn't win.  As they got older it was more often than not about homework.  And as they continue to mature, I'm sure there will be times where they will want to give up again, and they just might have a right to do so.  But it is my job to encourage them to keep going, to push through, not because they might just get it, but because they will learn from the struggle.

Five years ago on May 28th I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.  Sometimes it's hard to believe that it's been that long.  Other times it seems like an eternity.  When I was diagnosed giving up was not even in my vocabulary.  We were going to hit the cancer hard, get into remission, hit the 5 year mark free of cancer, and then feel like the worst was behind us.  There just wasn't any other option, so the thought of giving up never even entered my mind.

Since then, I've thought about giving up.  There have been times where Ive been so tired that I just don't want to be tired anymore.  There have been  times I have felt so sick that I thought I wasn't going to make it another couple of months.  I have dealt with drug withdrawals, neuropathy, surgeries, intense pain and depression.  I've been ready to give up and stop treatment.  Heaven seems much more appealing.

Yet I haven't given up.  Some of you might be thinking it's because of my family.  Honestly, that is only a very small part of why I don't give up.  The real reason I don't give up is because God hasn't let me know that it's time for me to give up.  I think he has more to teach me.

Max Lucado says it this way:

 "No, we don't give up.  We look up.

   We trust.    We believe.

   And our optimism in not hollow.

   Christ has proven worthy.

   He has shown that He never fails.

   That's what makes God, God."

My favorite line is "our optimism is not hollow".  At one point my optimism focused on my healing.  My optimism doesn't lie there any more, not because it's not possible, but because it's not necessary.  My healing is not dependent upon how much God loves me.  He proved His love for me long ago when He sent Jesus, His son, to die for me.  My healing doesn't correlate with how much I love God.  I love God because He has already saved me from my spiritual cancer.  My optimism now focuses on all the amazing things God has done for me from the beginning of time to my death and finally at my resurrection.  It's not hollow because Heaven will happen.  It's not hollow because I will rise again.  It's not hollow because my sins are forgiven.  It's not hollow because He has shown me countless times over the past five years how much He really does love me.  There is no doubt, just perfect hope.
Since He's taught me that over the past five years, I wonder what He has in store for me next.

Over the weekend I was given an amazing gift by one brother's family.  It was this bonsai tree.

The unique thing about this tree is that it was started 5 years ago on May 28th.  The same day I found out I had cancer and stared death in the face for the first time, this tree started it's life.  In some ways it's my own personal tree of life which I now get to look at every day.

This tree got me thinking about the Tree of Life in the Bible.  We all know about the one in Genesis that God placed in the Garden of Eden for Adam and Eve.  But we forget about the Tree of Life that is mentioned in Revelation.  The Tree of Life is in Heaven, the place where our paradise we lost is now restored.  Revelation 22:14 says "Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city."  Because of what Jesus has done for us, our robes are clean by His blood.  We now have the right to this Tree of Life.  We will be in Heaven forever.  

So why don't I give up?  It's not because I know I will be healed.  There is no guarantee in that. It's not because I need to be here for my family.  God will take care of them if it's time for me to go home. I don't give up because God will never, ever fail me.  I don't give up because He will lead me through whatever comes my way.  I don't give up because my God will take me home to live with Him forever.  That's why I don't give up.  That's why none of us ever need to give up.

World Cancer Day -- We Are Not Alone

Today is World Cancer Day.  If you watched the Super Bowl you would have seen this commercial by Chevrolet.  I know when we first heard the song we were wondering what this commercial was talking about. Then I saw the woman in the short hair and I knew.  One of my sons was sitting by me and when he saw the end of the commercial, he just squeezed my arm and said, "That's for you, Mom."

One thing I think that they were trying to convey is to show that cancer survivors need support.  But what I really liked about that commercial was what they said at the end about survivors.  Too often we think of survivors as those who have fought and won.  Chevy clearly spelled it out when they said they were "...celebrating survivors and those who support them in their road to recovery."  That encompasses everyone, from the person who is just starting a battle, to one who has finished, and even to the one who might have a battle that will last for more years than anyone thought was possible.

It's still hard for me to think about the fact that I am one of those fighting survivors and that my family has to face my cancer every day.  God has been gracious and given us more strength to deal with this than any of us would have ever dreamed possible.  But sometimes it's easy to feel like you are all alone in your fight.  Your friends and your family are there, but they just can't understand what you are going through.  And the survivors are there for there family, but even they don't know what their family is going through.  That feeling of being alone can become so overwhelming that at times you wonder if anyone really remembers anymore.  In your head you know it's not true, but the emotions take over and cry out in longing for some tangible comfort and support.

If we had to rely on our fellow man only for comfort, we could never be satisfied.  But because we have an omnipresent, or all present God, we have comfort surrounding us at all times.  He has promised to be with us always, to the very end of the age.

  He has promised that He has a plan for us. 

He has promised that what He has in store for us is better than anything we could understand.

But most importantly He promised His Son, a promise that has already been fulfilled.

 

You might be wondering what you can do today, or any day,  to support the survivors of cancer.  First and foremost, pray.  God has promised to hear our prayers and nothing is too big to ask of him.  But there are always other things you can do.  If you know someone who is just starting the battle, do something for them.  Don't ask what they need, instead just do something to brighten a day.  If you know someone who has the blessing of beating the disease, remind them that you are still thinking of them.  Rejoice with them that they have the gift of remission, a gift from God.  If you know someone who is in a long battle, don't forget them.  Listen to the joys and the fears that are had.  Think of a way to brighten a day.  God's love will shine through with whatever you do.  And if there is someone close to being done with a battle and it looks like they will be going to their eternal home, offer as much support as you can and constantly remind them of God's unfailing love.

May God use this day to lead many to show their support for cancer survivors and their families.  And may He also lead people to continue to support all those fighting.

Learning to Always be Thankful

 

Being thankful is something that we think should come naturally, but it always doesn't.  It's easy to be thankful when things are going well, but what about when things aren't going well?  Of course, that is when it gets harder.  In the life of a cancer patient, the thankfulness can easily come and go.

2012 ended with much thankfulness for our family.  I am on a treatment that is working and I am feeling better than I have in years.  I have more energy and I feel almost normal again, or at least what I think normal should now be.  But the beginning of 2012 was not like that.  I got sick very quickly.  I was admitted to the hospital three times.  I had to take an ambulance to the hospital because I couldn't breathe, and my children saw that ambulance in front of our house.  I had liters and liters of fluid drained from my abdomen and lungs.  I had to rest for three days just to get to my children's big events.  In some ways all of that seems like a dream now.  But I do remember that it was hard to find those things for which to be thankful.

But when I look back at the beginning of 2012, I can more easily see that there were things that make me overflow with thankfulness.  Our family got closer; our faith grew stronger; we were never without help.  These are all big things, but I'm sure there were many little things that I should have recognized and in turn been thankful.   

That sign above is like a slap in the face, isn't it?  Even in our struggles we are called to be thankful. 

This year I want to strive to be consciously thankful of things every day.  I want to learn to look for the little things to be thankful for, not just the big things.  It won't always be easy, but I will strive to do it.

To accomplish this goal I will have some help.  On New Year's Day a friend posted about this same thankful journey she was going on.  It's called  The Joy Dare.  (The link right here explains what this author, Ann Voskamp, is trying to do and encouraging others to do.)  When I looked at the pdf file I noticed how unique the things were that she was looking for.  I knew instantly this was something I wanted to do.

But the tricky part always is accountability.  I thought about writing everything in a journal, but journal writing for me comes and goes.  Then I remembered my other goal of 2013 was to do some more blogging.  And God, as he always does, helped me realize this was the perfect way to do both.

So throughout the next year I will be posting about the things for which I am thankful.  I will just keep it to one blog post per month and edit it, hopefully, every day.  By the time I am done I should have at least 1000 things that I have been thankful for over 2013.  It's going to be an amazing journey and I hope you enjoy going along with me. 

My prayer for all of us this year is that we can see God in so many more ways than we even thought possible, from the best of the best, to the small of the small.

When Miracles Happen

Have you ever hoped for a miracle?  I always thought about all those miracles performed in the Bible and thought, "Wouldn't it be cool if I saw something like that?"  I'm here to tell you today that God is working a miracle in me.

A short month ago I told you how my new treatment was working so well.  Last week Thursday I got a call from my oncologist.  Now understand, she rarely calls me and it's usually due to something we have to change in our treatment.  That wasn't the case this time.  She just had to call because she was so excited.  If you remember, last time my Ca-125 dropped from 1300+ to 500.  Well, it dropped again, this time to 192.  It hasn't been that low since April of 2011.  She just can't believe the results we are getting from this drug. Neither can her team because they had to call me early Friday morning because they were also very excited.

From a human standpoint, it's easy to see why this looks so unbelievable.  We got this drug faster than anyone is normally supposed to get it.  It's working better than anyone expected.  I have energy and stamina like I haven't had in years.  How can this be explained?

But I know.  It's God and all God.  The God who is all-powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere is the one who had this plan worked out for me before the world was created.  He knew I was going to need more strength to help my son with his broken ankle.  He knew that it was time for me to be more involved with my family.  He knew it was time for me to see His awesome power. 

Join me today in praising our God and Savior for the physical miracle he is working in me.  But also join me in praising God for the miracle He has worked in you -- that is the miracle of your faith.  We know that He worked that miracle in you because of of this verse in Ephesians:

 

We are all miracles because of God's grace working faith in our hearts.  We can thank God for miracles every day.  To God be the Glory!

Running the Race

Our family has really been enjoying the Olympics this year.  It's amazing to see how dedicated these people are to their training and to their sport.  Win or loose, their dedication is inspiring.


It got me thinking about my journey with cancer.  It really is like a race, and even more like a marathon.  It's not something you can sprint through.  You put one foot in front of the other and keep going.  Some parts of the race are easier while others are much harder.  But to get to the finish line you just keep going.  Win or loose, you just need to get there.


With cancer there are many ways of looking at if you are winning or loosing.  It all depends on where you are in your treatment and what you are hoping for.  For most winning will mean being in remission.  For others like myself, winning means having a good quality of life.  That's what I've been praying for and that is what God has granted me this last month with more energy.  


One month ago I started a clinical trial with the drug veliparib, a parp inhibitor.  Our goal with this was truly to have a better quality of life.  Anything else we always felt would be an extra blessing from God.  Well, He in His infinite wisdom and mercy decided to give us an extra blessing. 
After one month I got my first cancer number back today. It is 500!!!! It had been somewhere between 1300 and 1400 just one short month ago. All I can do is give God the glory!!

When I think back to May when my oncologist suggested this, and then how quickly it came about that I was able to be put on a drug trial, I can only say that this was all in God's control. He had this worked out years ago when we started this journey. He knew I was going to need to be more active so I could help my son with his broken ankle. He knew that through this I could share His awesome power. He knew that this was a time where we needed to see something more tangible in how He is taking care of us. What more can I say but THANK YOU GOD!!

But back to the race.  Yes, my life with cancer is a race with ups and downs.  I just keep pressing forward to the goal of remission.  But really our entire life is a race.  Here's what the Apostle Paul says in 1 Corinthians:

While I would love the prize of remission, there is a bigger prize that I want even more.  I want the prize of Heaven.  Praise be to God that He has given us this prize not by anything that we have done or might be able to do.  We would never measure up by doing it ourselves.  We have only received this prize through the life, death and resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ.  I am going to run the race God has given me always pressing toward the goal of Heaven.  I can do this by surrounding myself daily with His Word and His promises.  I can be strengthened by receiving His body and blood in communion.  Because of His grace and mercy I will be in Heaven some day.  Even if I never reach the goal of remission, I am still a winner because I am a winner in Christ.

What happens after this is all in God's control. If this is where my number stays that's His plan. If it continues to drop, it's His plan. If it goes up, it's His plan.  We continue to know like it say in Proverbs, 

We will continue to bask in this wonderful news. We will continue to pray boldly to ask for healing.  But no matter what happens, I am a winner in Christ Jesus.

Cancer Is Not Big

Today I just learned of another woman who found out she has ovarian cancer.  Memories of the day that I found out came flooding back once again.  It's always amazing to me how that event in my life can bring back such powerful, scary memories, as well as many questions.  Can I beat this?  Will it beat me?  How will I get through this?  What will happen to me?

It was interesting in the days that followed my diagnosis how my perspective changed.  It turned to can I beat this to I will beat this.  It turned from how will I get through this to I will get through this.  It turned from what will happen to me to God will take care of me.

There was a song from Veggietales that often came to mind during the first few months of treatment.  It was always one of my kids favorites.  It's called God is Bigger than the Boogieman. 

Video for God is Bigger than the Boogieman

It was a song that always made me smile.  It was so simple, yet so true.  And it got me thinking, if God is bigger than the boogieman, then of course God is bigger than cancer.

Now don't get me wrong, cancer is a tough road to go through.  It affects your body, your mind and your spirit.  You go through ups and downs weekly, daily and even multiple times a day.  There are days you wonder if you are going to get through it.  You can't get through it by yourself, you have to rely on God.

Today I got a devotion sent to me that sums up everything about God and why you can rely on Him. 

You can ask the Lord
because He will not give you a wrong answer.
You can wait upon the Lord
because His timing is always perfect.
You can trust in the Lord
because He makes no mistakes.
You can hope in the Lord
because He holds your future.
You can rest in the Lord
because He is in control of your life.
You can lean upon the Lord
because He is completely faithful.

Here are some Bible verses that show that:

So just as God is bigger than the boogieman, He is also bigger than cancer.  And if He is bigger than cancer, which for so many of us is the big problem we never want to face, than of course He is bigger than any trial, struggle, pain or sadness than we have.  What a wonderful God we have!

The Highs and Lows Of Cancer

We all have highs and lows in our lives.  They start from the time we are young.  When we are young something from a scraped knee to not watching a TV show can make for "the worst day ever." and then it can turn around by getting something as simple as a Popsicle.   As we get older we have the highs of a first date, a wedding and the birth of children.  But there are the lows with struggling with kids, seeing loved ones hurting and just the trials of everyday life. 


I was looking over my cancer journal today on Carepages and realized how quickly the highs and lows of cancer really come.  I went from a low of the diagnosis, to the high of treatment working, to the high of remission, to the low of the cancer being back all in the matter of 10 months.  Since then there have been highs and lows between treatments working and not working, feeling great and then getting very sick, plus the normal highs and lows that every family goes through in life.  Some might look at my family and me and wonder how we get through it all.


As I was looking through my journal I came across this post on a day that was definitely a low, even though it wasn't a major one.  Here's what I wrote:

"Today was a mixed day. I was tired from a car alarm going off at 2:30 in the morning. The owner didn't hear it so it went off for about 1/2 hour. Between that and the storm that blew through, it was a restless night. Nausea is still there. Today I had a hard time eating. I talked to my nurse today and she put me on some different medication that we are hoping helps. If this one doesn't, we do have one more option. Hopefully this will be the trick that takes it away....

 I ended up doing quite a bit of driving today -- Bible class, chiropractor appointment and picking up kids from school. I was pretty tired as I was driving and I wondered how I could keep my stamina up. One of my favorite songs by Casting Crowns came on the radio "Praise You In The Storm". Part of the song quotes this Psalm from the Bible:

 
As I drove in the valley and looked up to the hills I could feel God watching over me and making sure I had just enough stamina to get to school and back. Nothing that the world throws at me can take God's protection away. He is watching over me all the time and making sure I get to go home to Heaven one day. What an amazing God we have."

 My family and I don't get through the highs and lows of this journey because of anything we do.  It is only because of what God does for us.  And when you think about it, none of us get through any of the highs and lows of our lives on our own.  God is there watching us always because He never sleeps.  He promises He will be with us forever, no matter what gets thrown our way.  How appropriate to look to the hills and remember God through our highs and lows.  During our lows we can look up and remember we have a God who is taking care of us, and during our highs we can look up and remember that God has directed us and given us that blessing.  May you always be able to look at the hills and remember what a loving, caring God you have.

Sometimes with Cancer Things Do Go Well

When you are fighting cancer, it's easy to get caught up in the hard things.  You can see the good things, like numbers going down, tumors shrinking, or even feeling better.  But just like any difficult memory it's hard to totally block it our of your mind, and at times it can consume you.  That's what my day was like on Tuesday. 


Wednesday morning I felt better physically.  As I was waiting to be picked up for hydration I went on Pinterest and saw this picture:

That struck me profoundly.  In my cancer journey we've been waiting for things for a while now.  I took a step back, prayed, and knew for sure that I did trust God when His answer was wait.  I just didn't know that His answer was going to change that day.


Yesterday as I was in hydration, one of my oncologist's nurses came up to see me.  This is not a normal thing so it was a surprise.  She said,"I have some good news for you.  Well, at least I think it's good news."  My friend and I were a bit taken aback with her statement, but that's the type of humor I've gotten to know from her over the past three years.  She then told me that I had been approved for the parp inhibitor.  I was in shock, mostly because it wasn't supposed to happen this quickly.


When you go through this process there is quite a bit of paperwork to fill out.  I didn't have to do any of it, but by the reaction of my nurses, I knew it was going to be a big job.  They also had to get my whole history together and my oncologist had to write up my story as to why this would be beneficial for me.  I had confidence that my team would get this done quickly, but you never know how long a drug company can take to review something like this.


Everyone, my oncologist, my nurses, and of course my family was in shock with the speed that this happened.  I'm also in shock as to how I am going to get this new medicine.  I don't know what was said, who saw this or what made them agree to this.  But I do know that God worked this out just for me.  And this is all I can say in response:

I'm sure some of you are wondering what a parp inhibitor is.  The best layman's term explanation that someone sent me was from the website Cancer Research UK.

"To use an analogy, cells with a faulty BRCA gene are like a table that’s had one of its legs knocked out from under it. It can still just about function, although it’s a bit wobbly. Knocking out the other leg (using PARP inhibitors) makes the table completely unstable and it falls over.

PARP inhibitors work by preventing cancer cells from repairing certain types of damage to their DNA. Most healthy cells have other ways of repairing DNA damage so they aren’t affected by the drugs, but cancer cells with faulty BRCA1 or BRCA2 can’t carry out these repairs. The combined effect of knocking out both DNA repair mechanisms is so severe that the cancer cells die."  (If you want a little more information from this site here's the link) 

 http://scienceblog.cancerresearchuk.org/2011/07/12/widening-the-net-for-parp-inhibitors/


If everything goes smoothly, I will be starting my clinical trail on July 6th.  I will be on the parp inhibitor Veliparib or ABT-888.  A parp inhibitor is different from chemo in that you take it orally rather than through infusion. One plus will be I won't have to make as many trips to the cancer center. I will be taking 3 pills twice a day, for a total of 6 pills a day.  This will be something I will continue on, as far as I know at this point, indefinitely.   The main side effect is nausea, which could be a challenge for me because it's hard to find something that will calm my nausea.  But that should improve after about two weeks.  I have heard from others on this parp inhibitor that they have done fine with the nausea and some haven't had any.  We will just let God lead the way on that one.


We meet with my oncologist on July 2nd and we will have our many questions answered. 


Is this the silver bullet or the golden ticket that we have been hoping for?  Truly, only God knows that.  The main reason my oncologist wanted me on this is because she knew it would give me the best quality of life I could have while still fighting cancer.  But like I've always said, cancer isn't bigger than God.  Now, as always, we pray for another yes to come my way. If it doesn't I will just look back at today and remember "Do you trust me when my answer is wait? ~God"

What If My Cancer Becomes Chronic Cancer?

Just over three years ago I was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer.  It was unexpected, scary and devastating.  But once the surgery was done we were given hope that I would go into long-term remission.  I was young, healthy, and even though it wasn't caught early, my team felt I was one who could beat it.

Just over two years ago, four months after finding No Evidence of Disease (NED), the cancer was back.  While this was hard to hear, we felt that it was found early and once again I could have NED.  That wasn't the case.  Because of my BRCA mutation, and the fact that it was found so quickly, my oncologist termed my cancer as platinum resistant, recurrent, and incurable.  We were now looking at quality of life issues rather than quantity of life issues. 

Just recently I heard a term that is much more tolerable than incurable. Chronic cancer was the term I heard.   Incurable, at least for me at first,  gave me the thought that I was going to die very soon.  But that wasn't the case.   Chronic means that it is ongoing and can be treated, even if it isn't cured. Chronic means that there are options out there that can help you keep your cancer at bay. Chronic means that you can live a full life, even if it isn't as easy as before you had cancer.  There are many chronic diseases out there like diabetes, arthritis and fibromyalgia.  Cancer can be one of them.

So what do you do if you find out your cancer is chronic?  For each person it is different.  Some people, like me, will rely on their oncologist and team to give them the best course of action.  Others will do lots of research finding different methods of treatment or lifestyles (diets, naturopaths) to change their treatment or help their treatment.  Others might just choose to stop treatment depending on their age, how long they've been battling, or just knowing they can't handle any more treatment.  That is what my mom decided to do when she was battling ovarian cancer.  There is no one right answer for everyone.  It has to be what is right for you.

There are some things, however, that I think everyone can do when faced with chronic cancer.

1. Give yourself the right to be sad at times.  We so often hear that we need to stay positive and strong to beat this, we feel like breaking down isn't either of those things.  It's OK to be sad.  It's OK to be scared.  However, if you feel sad all the time, you might have  a chemical imbalance or a vitamin deficiency.  I have been on a calming medication that works for me.  Talk to a doctor or psychiatrist for help.
2. Find an eating plan that is right for you.  Dealing with cancer long-term means your body is going to go through lots of changes.  One that happened to me recently was that all of the sudden I became lactose intolerant.  I have many digestive issues so I'm trying to keep up with my fiber intake and need to take a daily dose of Miralax.  I also need to keep up on my protein intake because of the chemo I am now on, because that just makes me feel better.  It's a juggling act, and at times I feel like I'm always learning something new, but it's something that you can do.  Once again, make sure you talk about any diet changes with your oncologist.
3. Get exercise when you can.  When I first started battling cancer, I was able to do lots of walking.  The more chemos I've been on, the harder it has become.  Another reason is that I got very sick the beginning of this year due to fluid build-up and I couldn't spend much time out of bed.  Even taking a shower put me down for a couple of hours.  I've learned to walk either around the house or outside, depending on what is right for me that day.  None of these walks are long. And, even though I get discouraged at times, I look back and remember where I was just a few short months ago.  And sometimes exercise just means activity.  I can do much more around the house than I was able to.  That not only build up my body, but also my mental state.
4. Rest when you need to.  I think that is one of the hardest things for me because I was always such an active person.  But once again, just like the previous point, I was very sick and I have to remember that my body needs rest.  So I try and rest when my body tells me to.  If I rest each time my body tells me to, then I'm not so tired the next day.  If I don't, there is a good possibility that I will be super tired and not able to do much the next day.
5. Look for the blessings in your life.  Dealing with cancer is hard and at times we get so consumed with cancer we forget to look around us and see all that we have versus what we have lost through cancer.  My palliative care nurse told me to find something tangible that gives me joy every day.  She has flowers that she can smell and see every day and that gives her joy. My joy in general comes from my children.  Once again, it will be different for everyone. 
6. This last one might seem strange, but it's one I've learned over three years of chronic cancer.  Look for blessings that have come from your cancer.  My children and I are much closer as we have gone through the ups and downs of cancer.  My husband and I communicate better.  I never knew how many people truly cared about me until cancer came into our lives.  Would I want to have cancer if I had the choice?  Absolutely not.  But at the same time I wouldn't want to never see the blessings that have come through my cancer.

The things above can help you as you deal with chronic cancer.  But that is not what is going to get you through every up and down that you have.  The only person that will do that is our God.  I've learned and relearned how to rely on Him.  He is the source of my perseverance.  Here is a Bible verse that talks about perseverance.

It can seem strange to see in writing that we can rejoice in our sufferings. Note that it says in our sufferings, not because of our sufferings. Just look at all the things suffering produces -- perseverance, or bearing up under adversity; character, or positive attributes through withstanding tough situations, and hope, or trust and confidence.  God works all these things in us through the hardships that enter our lives, whether it be money struggles, family struggles, health struggles, and even chronic cancer.

And what about that hope, or that trust and confidence.  In all our struggles, we have that hope and confidence that God will take care of us.  Why?  Because He has already taken care of our biggest struggle, our sin.  He did that when He sent His Son to live a perfect life, die on the cross and rise again.  Our sins are forgiven, no matter how great or small we think they are. We now have the hope of going to Heaven.  If our biggest struggle has been taken care of, how can we not say the God can take care of these other ones?

You can deal with chronic cancer, not because of your own power or knowledge, but because of the power and love of our God.  Let Him lead you in all the decisions you have to make.  Let Him build your perseverance, character and hope.  That's how I have been able to deal with this diagnosis, and that's how you will too.